Finding First Principles
the autobiography
forward – written by the author (ironically enough, the novel is written by the same author).
chapter 1 – Quitting
chapter 2 – Burgs
chapter 3 – Simplicity
chapter 4 – Application
chapter 5 – Dessert
afterward – also written by the author.
#morecreativethancorporate
“Once you see the boundaries of your environment, they are no longer the boundaries of your environment.” – Marshall McLuhan
The recipe is at the end. It’s simple. And it’s dessert.
The post… well, the post is more difficult to explain. I guess it’s about simplicity.
Yeah. It’s about simplicity.
Even though it’s about simplicity, I’m going to throw a lot out there and leave the synthesis to you.
(nobody asked for this)
Stay with me… you’ll really want to make it to dessert.
Some of you have been polite enough to journey with me for the last two years (year 1 recap | year 2 recap). Thank you. It’s been a ride. And 2023 is turning out to be wild (#yellow2023 –> Saturday Suppers, forthcoming | #iykyk).
Lately, I’ve been wondering,
“how did we learn it, that talent for insatiability?” – Margaret Atwood
How did we learn to always want more, to achieve, to accomplish? How did our minds become capitalists within our own bodies such that our meals have to get bigger and every moment has to be profitable? How did we become so driven to monetize our hobbies to the point of requirement?
And lately, I’ve been thinking that I don’t want to be on a path. I want to be on a journey.
I quit my job so that I could pursue growth instead of progress. Read that again.
“it’s just we get so messy, it’s not that we are doing lots of wrong things
Our mind is so messy
We don’t keep it simple
And we end up making the life that we are living, so in-ordinarily complicated
Completely unnecessarily, and it’s such a shame to end up feeling, in a real muddle
When actually, you ought to be having the time of your lives…
When you came here
You came here with a sense of awe and wonder, dying to just see what it’s about
You know, it’s like, what would it be like?
To be down there?
To be part of it?
And you came here with a sense of wonder
And somehow the wonder of it wasn’t enough
And we stopped wondering and started to wonder about ourselves
And in your wondering about yourself
You forgot what you came here for, what you came to be a part of.”Burgs
You all know that I am fond of First Principles thinking.
“In philosophy and science, a first principle is a basic proposition or assumption that cannot be deduced from any other proposition or assumption.” – Wikipedia
You all know that I like solving problems in the style of Enrico Fermi, e.g., How many piano tuners are there in the city of Chicago?
“In physics or engineering education, a Fermi problem is an estimation technique designed to teach dimensional analysis or approximation of extreme scientific calculations… The estimation technique is named after physicist Enrico Fermi as he was known for his ability to make good approximate calculations with little or no actual data. Fermi problems typically involve making justified guesses about quantities and their variance or lower and upper bounds.
– Wikipedia
We all know that good Machine Learning (ML) and good simulation are predicated on accurate dimensionality reduction – the ability to condense complex data into fewer dimensions for computation while still retaining the data’s most important properties.
You all know that the whole reason I did a PhD in agent-based modeling and simulation is because the mental gymnastics of distilling collective human behavior into a computational model fascinates me (dimensionality reduction and parametrization at its finest).
Some of you know that the dissertation I wanted to write was on the discovery and evidencing of certain so-called “Universals,” e.g., fractal geometry, the golden ratio, or the presence of negation or incrementation in language. The particular Universal in which I took interest and aspired to propose to the world of academia was a growth and decay function that could be fit to many things, inclusive of birth and death of individual organisms, evolution and extinction of collective species, and the rise and fall of civilizations (the first ABM I ever coded was a rise and fall of civilizations model). As a budding PhD student, I drafted a paper and submitted it to Nature. It was obviously never published. My professors told me this pursuit was a life’s work, not a dissertation, and a topic so new that it would be difficult to corroborate with extant scholarship. This did not satisfy me as a valid reason not to study something… simply because it had never been studied before. Nevertheless, the professors assured me I would not graduate anytime soon should I choose to pursue such an innovative and, as such, easily discredited topic. So I wrote my dissertation on the modeling and simulation of forced migration patterns resulting from global conflict events like the civil war in Syria.
It was a fine dissertation. Not at all interesting.
So what do First Principles, Fermi problems, dimensionality reduction, machine learning, and quitting my job all have in common?
Simplicity.
The art and nuance of taking the incredible complexity of life (of science, emotion, human interaction, ecology, physiology – “the tragic miracle of consciousness” as Steinbeck would call it) and making it simple.
Digestible. Interpretable. Transmissible. Tractable. Repeatable. Intuitive. Balanced. Consistent.
Reducing its dimensionality.
“I don’t want to be on a path. I want to be on a journey.”
“I quit my job so I could pursue growth, not progress.”
What do these statements really mean?
I don’t want to be on a path that leads to somewhere. I want to be on a journey to discover all the places I could go.
I don’t want to make progress towards a goal. I want to grow as a person to discover what my goals could be.
Most of us were there in college – that place of exploration, mostly because we had yet to figure out what else we would do. Or could do. And then we graduated and had to make money, we found jobs, advanced studies for some of us, and then we found “career paths.” And we settled into them. Manager, Director, Vice President, Senior Vice President, Executive.
And somewhere in following the path through the woods, we forgot how to explore the forest. We forgot about alternate paths, we forgot about making paths (forgot about our machetes and our minds). We forgot about the beautiful nights we spent with friends camping in a clearing with no paths leading to it – just the random place where a group of college kids decided to pitch their tents for the evening and drink beer.
“…when actually, you ought to be having the time of your lives.” – Burgs
So how does one go from being on a path to being on a journey? How does one pursue growth as opposed to progress?
I am not entirely sure but I’ve got some leads. It is definitely difficult to break the habit of progress in the mind; carefree is a difficult art to master. Some of you may have seen my themes from last summer in the Balkans:
“the things we find when we aren’t looking forward, but around…”
“not moving until you feel where you are truly supposed to be next”
Both of these things in the spirit of journey over path. This year, I’ve spent some time redefining my relationship with silence. And I’ve spent some time re-acquainting myself with stillness. Halfway through the year, here is what I see…
The leads:
- Be bored. My mom used to tell me when I was a kid that it was good to be bored. The eight-year-old me did not believe her. The 33-year-old me certainly does. Recently, while reading about peoples’ childhoods, I read that “the immersion in boredom is a universal in the biographies of exceptional people.” Not only was I thrilled that it was noted as a “universal” (smile) but I quickly realized precisely how difficult it is to be bored as an older person (#adulting). With kids, jobs, gyms, partners, and extracurriculars, there isn’t any time to be bored. When the room is silent, we put on music or TV. When we’ve got a drive, we make a phone call. Where there is empty space, we fill it. Oh no, being bored was going to require much more than carving out three hours on a weekend afternoon as “time to be bored.” And yet becoming bored I quickly began to view as integral to my journey back to curiosity. By letting the mind first rest, idle, then wander, it would have the requisite space to become inspired, curious, and creative.
- Get simple.
“it’s just we get so messy, it’s not that we are doing lots of wrong things
Our mind is so messy
We don’t keep it simple
And we end up making the life that we are living, so in-ordinarily complicated.”Burgs
What do you need (like, really need)? What do you enjoy? Be honest. Really honest. It’s probably things like: 1) to move your body, 2) to physically touch someone you love, 3) to eat nourishing, whole foods for lunch, 4) to drink more water, 5) to stretch, 6) to laugh, 7) to learn something really interesting, 8) to walk instead of drive, 9) sunshine, 10) a slight change of context.
I heard someone say something interesting the other day. To paraphrase: if a plant doesn’t grow, doesn’t blossom or bloom, we don’t blame the plant. We check its environment. We check the soil; does it have nutrients and water? We check the placement; does it have sunlight? Perhaps we should all check our environments. Change it. More sunlight, more walks, more water. More music, more silence, less supposed to.
- Allow yourself to do without purpose. Yep, I’ve been in an art phase this year. It started with painting and then the interest migrated to collage art thanks to a beautiful and super talented friend of mine (<– srsly check her out, @gigiripps) All this from a wholly un-artistic person. I cook. I write. I do not paint or draw or… crochet. Anyway.
What I am learning from art and taking from art is simple: for someone whose every action serves an explicit purpose in life, big or small, taking action without explicit purpose is cathartic, freeing, and integral to what I am now calling the Ecology of the Soul (essay forthcoming).
In example, every job I have accepted in my life has been with the purpose of progressing down my career path. I play videogames with the purpose of finishing the game, adding games played and books read like trophies to my physical and virtual living room shelves. I take classes to learn, exercise to stay healthy, cook to ensure proper nutrition – even watching TV, which I rarely do, with purpose and intentionality to consume a specific thing (this, I would argue, is a good thing).
But what I never do… is do something… without purpose. Until painting. The day I put brush to canvas without confidence that I could paint, without an idea of what I would paint, and without expectation that it be something, was an important day. I thought it would not last more than a couple of hours before it faded quietly from my life, the memory relegated to a forgotten Thursday afternoon one day at home when I was sad. Since that Thursday afternoon, the creativity, joy, curiosity, and focus that have poured out of me onto canvas through acrylic paint, oil paint, and shit I cut out of magazines, has managed to rupture my static in a way that my year deeply required.
This un-artistic girl is now building an art studio in her basement.
Summer Art
- Open the aperture without committing time and energy. How to explore while still staying simple. How to let everything in without quickly becoming overcommitted, overwhelmed, overextended with invitations, requests, opportunities. Allow things to come and go. Don’t chase people; don’t chase opportunities. Don’t chase. Don’t follow. Be. Open up, let the world come to you, and let it flow through you without grabbing and holding on to any one thing. Be deliberate with your action and with your time. But spend time. Spend time on conversation. Spend time with people. Spend time with new ideas. Spend time in the present without lamenting the past or worrying about the future. Spend time, some times, without purpose.
“If it costs you your peace, it’s too expensive.” – Paolo Coelho
In closing,
How does this apply to food? (because that’s what OneandaHalfSlices does)
Complexity in terms of food is synonymous with “processed.” Lots of flavors, lots of ingredients, lots of preservatives and chemicals to enrich it, to make it last longer, to make it taste better.
You also pay for that processing. With dollars. The more a food is processed (say, from wheat, to grain, to flour, to cracker, to cookie or cereal or bar), the higher the price. The steps to create it are more complex. The ingredient list is more complex. That complexity is what you are paying for at the checkout line. In addition to whatever Organic, USDA approved, shenanigans of a seal or logo some third-party organization has slapped on the box.
Keep it simple.
Eat real, whole foods – meat, fish, nuts, grains, seeds, legumes, fruits, vegetables, and things that are naturally sweet (honey, maple syrup, dates).
How does this apply to lifestyle and experience? (because that’s what Merigold does)
You only need a few things. (#measurelesslivemore). These are the First Principles of my life. Find yours.
- Movement – start with Steph Rose at Phase6.
- Hydration – two to three liters a day.
- Nutrition, #eatfoodnottoomuchmostlyplants and nothing that comes in a package (Michael Pollan)
- Rest, #measurelesslivemore
- Balance, #equalpartsdisciplineandindulgence
- Consistency – to treat oneself with equal parts discipline and indulgence, and to do so consistently. Do it every day.
And I’ll add one more… Community. You can find it in places like #yellow2023, our Saturday Suppers in Arlington, Longstone Farm’s Sunday Suppers, Oktoberfests done right, or right here on OneandahalfSlices. Diversity of thought, of heart, of the collective. We hope to see you around this Fall.
Reach out below or hit me up on the Substack at the bottom of this post.
“The chance to be part of this happens briefly
The invitation is not to show how inventive and imaginative you are
But how much you can notice what you’re already part of
And appreciate it and share it
And care about those that are around who count for their welfare
While you are looking out for your own, that’s it
And then you’ll get to the end of it, having had an awesome time
Knowing that that is something you’d recommend to others”
Burgs
I promised you a recipe. So here it is. A recipe in the spirit of simplicity (oh, also, in that same vein, try my little lemon cake). This dessert is simple. It is exactly the kind of dessert we should be eating. I could eat it every day. And don’t forget to sprinkle your lemonade.
what you need
6 pitted medjool dates, cut in half
2 tablespoons nut butter of choice (mine is almond)
2 strawberries
(optional) 1 tablespoon cacao nibs
how to make it
halve your dates.
spread nut butter inside each half.
top with a small strawberry slice and 1-2 nibs.
enjoy deliberately.
“Do not eat. Taste. Savor. Relish. Be mindful. But do not eat.” – Ralph Fiennes, The Menu
“I am a student. And then I become the megaphone.” – Jane Fonda
Announcement: with this post, I have launched the Merigold Substack entitled Unrequited Philosophy. The more literarily-inclined and curious are encouraged to subscribe below.
